I got an XBox and this new game Fable this weekend. Fable is a pretty standard role playing game but with the notable addition that your character is constantly presented with moral dilemmas and the game tailors itself to how you respond to these situations. Within 5 minutes of turning this damned fool contraption on I was forced to decide whether I wanted to play Fable or not get kicked out by my girlfriend. Haha, just kidding, I was actually presented with the ethical decision of whether I should guard a man's house while he was away or loot it in his absence. Now keep in mind that before I even started playing this game I had decided that my in-game alter ego would either choose to ignore or fail to recognize all the basic rules of civilized social interaction. Obviously, I robbed that man blind and lied about it.
Basically everything in this game is up to your own discretion; your character can even decide what pants, hat, gloves, shirt, and boots he wears. I quickly found out that running around in your underpants is a good way to make new friends. You can also go to a barber shop and get a new haircut or beard, but once you find out that the Hulk Hogan mustache is an option, there isn't much of a choice left to make.
One thing about this game that I like is how it pretends to be surprised when, given a predicament where I have to decide whether to rat out a man cheating on his wife or keep his secret, I invariably choose to beat them both up, pick their pockets, then defile their prone bodies by urinating on them.
The game's clever artificial intelligence grows with my increasingly vile persona by giving me the ability to communicate in new and different ways based on the way I have acted in the past. Because of my singularly awful behavior, the only way I know how to interact with women is to flick them off, thrust my pelvis at them or, my favorite expression, the aptly titled 'obscene gesture'.
Everything about this game is very realistic, the graphics are top-notch except for being occasionally choppy, I assume this has something to do with loading from the disc. The realistic shadow effects are incredible, when you see the dappled sunlight coursing through the trees and making a mottled pattern on your back you will probably do what I did, which was to smash someone else's personal property then stand there with my hands on my hips laughing a manly laugh and sneering at any small children walking by.
One of the most touted features of this game is how your character grows to physically reflect all the things that he has done. To test the mettle of this, I have switched to a pie only diet. I have also tried to remind myself to halt my wheezing run every few minutes to swill a couple of beers to complete my grotesque transformation into a horrible stinking freak show. I'm glad that Peter Molyneux (the abstract genius behind Fable) decided he didn't have time to add in the ability to conceive children with your optional virtual wife, because I'm pretty sure my character would have taken it upon himself to perform a couple of impromptu abortions. On a somewhat related note, my neighbors have encouraged me to not drink more than 3 or 4 beers at a time, I guess they don't want me reliving that hour long whisky fueled berserker rage I flew into last night in the Hero's Guild. I killed 52 innocent civilians and guards and racked up over 100,000 dollars in fines for myself, stopping only to double over and vomit then frisk the slain for pies. It's going to be hard for them to collect the ludicrous fines they have assessed, though, because I tend to quickly squander all my money in one of the game's many gambling dens as soon as it comes into my filthy hands.
I was able to wrench myself away from Fable for a few hours to hang out with Tommy, Charles and Catherine at their awesome, relatively new apartment in the district. We walked over to some bar where we stuck around just long enough to realize we were never going to hear the songs Aaron put on the jukebox. On the walk over there Aaron proposed making a CD of attempted socially conscious ballads by 80s metal bands that ended up just being ignorant and possibly offensive - he got as far as suggesting Winds of Change by the Scorpions, Cherokee by Europe and 18 and Life by Skid Row... he mentioned another one but I forgot what it was. The bartender at DC9 looked like a cross between Frank Zappa, Ron Jeremy, and Zorro. I appealed to Charles' love of gambling in trying to get him to play the Blackjack game in Fable to win me shiny gold coins but I guess virtual Casino loses its lustre when you realize the best thing you can use that money for is to buy Leather Boots +1 to kick chickens.
![]() | When we got back to their apartment we watched a couple episodes of the Venture Bros. on their TiVo. This is the only thing that could have made me laugh more uncontrollably than my own despicable behavior in a virtual world and cry more than my own realization of how pathetic I must seem right now. Any attempt to describe The Venture Bros. would probably result in failure, so I will just say that there is a butt throw and Tommy assures me that there has been a piss joke in every episode. It's on Saturday at 8pm on Cartoon Network. |
xcjtnq hcgjnke efcwu kqhzpji twpm zvockbi lkrhpci
Posted by: wizn ydbe at December 1, 2006 04:26 AMhawfeozs mdfrhoksi sinzl xrtvhbmcp cmtxrubv raukwxejy ifgxks
Posted by: rminoyk fpiz at December 6, 2006 11:01 AMipoxegnkt jwmlqehk awot qmxjep ctirel cotlv zphlqm
Posted by: uetkcpo tacdrekqn at December 6, 2006 11:08 AMVery good site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: pulling baby tooth at December 7, 2006 04:47 AMCool site. Thanks.
Nice site. Thanks!
Cool site. Thanks!!!
Nice site. Thanks!!!
Nice site. Thanks:-)
Nice site. Thank you.
Good site. Thank you!!!
Good site. Thanks!!!
Cool site. Thanks!!!
Cool site. Thanks:-)
Nice site. Thanks!!!
Good site. Thank you!
Very good site. Thank you:-)
Good site. Thank you:-)
Posted by: massage escorte var at December 7, 2006 12:29 PMNice site. Thank you!!!
Good site. Thanks:-)
Cool site. Thank you.
Posted by: newyorkcarinsurance at December 7, 2006 01:09 PMNice site. Thanks!!!
Very good site. Thank you!!!
Very good site. Thank you!
Very good site. Thank you!
Nice site. Thank you!!!
Nice site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: college party at December 7, 2006 03:40 PMNice site. Thanks:-)
Very good site. Thanks!
Cool site. Thank you:-)
Posted by: sexy britney spear at December 7, 2006 04:37 PMVery good site. Thank you!!!
Nice site. Thanks!!!
Good site. Thank you!!!
Good site. Thanks!!!
Very good site. Thank you!
Posted by: harper college at December 7, 2006 05:39 PMNice site. Thanks.
Very good site. Thank you:-)
Very good site. Thanks.
Cool site. Thank you!
Very good site. Thanks!
Cool site. Thanks!
Nice site. Thanks:-)
Cool site. Thanks:-)
Good site. Thank you:-)
Good site. Thank you:-)
Cool site. Thanks!
Posted by: instant car insurance quote online at December 7, 2006 09:21 PMVery good site. Thank you:-)
Cool site. Thank you!!!
Good site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: free cyber sex chat rooms at December 7, 2006 09:49 PMVery good site. Thanks!!!
Posted by: cyber sex web cam at December 7, 2006 10:15 PMGood site. Thank you:-)
Posted by: philippine cyber sex at December 7, 2006 10:42 PMGood site. Thank you!
Nice site. Thanks!
Very good site. Thanks!!!
Nice site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: kinky cyber sex at December 7, 2006 11:48 PMGood site. Thank you!!!
Very good site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: have cyber sex at December 8, 2006 12:24 AMVery good site. Thanks!
Nice site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: cyber sex web site at December 8, 2006 01:00 AMCool site. Thanks!!!
Nice site. Thank you:-)
Cool site. Thank you:-)
Posted by: cyber i like sex at December 8, 2006 02:28 AMNice site. Thank you!
Good site. Thanks!!!
Posted by: free porn star photo gallery at December 8, 2006 02:50 AMNice site. Thank you.
Nice site. Thanks!!!
Nice site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: call free gallery kellys porn secret at December 8, 2006 03:32 AMCool site. Thanks!!!
Good site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: free indian porn gallery at December 8, 2006 04:14 AMNice site. Thanks!!!
Good site. Thanks!!!
Posted by: daily free gallery hardcore porn at December 8, 2006 04:50 AMGood site. Thank you!!!
Very good site. Thanks!
Good site. Thanks!
Posted by: free russian porn gallery at December 8, 2006 05:29 AMGood site. Thanks!
Posted by: free russian porn gallery at December 8, 2006 05:29 AMNice site. Thanks:-)
Nice site. Thank you!!!
Good site. Thanks.
Very good site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: low cost airline ticket at December 8, 2006 07:21 AMVery good site. Thanks!
Very good site. Thanks!
Nice site. Thanks.
Good site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: airline cheap discount flight ticket at December 8, 2006 07:57 AMVery good site. Thanks:-)
Cool site. Thanks.
Nice site. Thanks!
Posted by: carisoprodol watson brand 350mg at December 8, 2006 08:31 AMGood site. Thank you:-)
Posted by: mas airline ticket at December 8, 2006 08:36 AMCool site. Thanks!
Very good site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: philippine airline ticket at December 8, 2006 09:15 AMGood site. Thanks.
Cool site. Thank you.
Nice site. Thank you:-)
Nice site. Thanks.
Nice site. Thank you.
Cool site. Thanks!
Posted by: airline ticket consolidators at December 18, 2006 12:19 PMCool site. Thanks:-)
Cool site. Thanks:-)
Cool site. Thanks!
Posted by: airline ticket auction at December 18, 2006 01:04 PMCool site. Thanks!
Posted by: airline ticket auction at December 18, 2006 01:04 PMGood site. Thanks:-)
Cool site. Thanks!
Good site. Thank you.
Nice site. Thanks!!!
Very good site. Thanks.
Posted by: buy-ultram at December 18, 2006 03:56 PMNice site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: cheap-ultram at December 18, 2006 04:27 PMGood site. Thanks.
Very good site. Thank you:-)
Nice site. Thank you.
Very good site. Thank you!!!
Nice site. Thank you!
Good site. Thanks!!!
Cool site. Thanks!!!
Good site. Thank you:-)
Posted by: kawasaki dirt bike at December 18, 2006 07:00 PMVery good site. Thank you!
Very good site. Thanks!!!
Good site. Thanks:-)
Good site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: coupon for lenscrafters eye glasses at December 18, 2006 07:59 PMNice site. Thanks!
Good site. Thank you!!!
Cool site. Thanks.
Very good site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: school-girl at December 18, 2006 09:17 PMNice site. Thanks!
Good site. Thanks!
Good site. Thank you!
Cool site. Thank you!!!
Good site. Thank you!
Nice site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: gambling online at December 18, 2006 11:38 PMVery good site. Thank you.
Posted by: roulette onlin at December 18, 2006 11:57 PMVery good site. Thanks!
Cool site. Thank you!!!
Nice site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: bank of america credit card at December 19, 2006 12:05 AMCool site. Thank you!!!
Cool site. Thank you!
Cool site. Thanks!
Nice site. Thanks!!!
Good site. Thank you.
Nice site. Thanks!!!
Good site. Thanks!
Posted by: 1940 ford pickup at December 19, 2006 03:02 AMGood site. Thanks!
Posted by: 1940 ford pickup at December 19, 2006 03:02 AMVery good site. Thank you!!!
Nice site. Thank you:-)
Nice site. Thanks.
Posted by: 1950 ford pickup at December 19, 2006 03:41 AMCool site. Thank you.
Cool site. Thanks:-)
Good site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: 1960 ford pickup at December 19, 2006 04:20 AMVery good site. Thank you!!!
Good site. Thanks:-)
Very good site. Thank you!!!
Cool site. Thanks!
Cool site. Thanks!
Nice site. Thank you.
Very good site. Thanks!!!
Cool site. Thanks!
Cool site. Thanks!
Posted by: 1940 ford pickup for sale at December 19, 2006 05:37 AMGood site. Thanks.
Cool site. Thank you!!!
Very good site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: 1978 ford pickup at December 19, 2006 06:20 AMGood site. Thank you.
Good site. Thank you!
Cool site. Thank you.
Good site. Thank you!
Posted by: 1976 ford pickup at December 19, 2006 07:01 AMVery good site. Thank you!
Very good site. Thank you:-)
Very good site. Thank you!!!
Good site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: 1929 ford pickup at December 19, 2006 07:54 AMVery good site. Thanks:-)
Very good site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: 65 ford pickup at December 19, 2006 08:34 AMNice site. Thank you!
Good site. Thanks!!!
Good site. Thank you!
Good site. Thank you:-)
Nice site. Thanks.
Posted by: 53 ford part pickup truck at December 19, 2006 10:01 AMCool site. Thanks:-)
Good site. Thanks!!!
Good site. Thank you.
Posted by: ford part pickup used at December 19, 2006 10:49 AMNice site. Thank you:-)
Good site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: 1956 ford pickup for sale at December 19, 2006 11:32 AMNice site. Thank you:-)
Nice site. Thanks!!!
Very good site. Thanks!!!
Nice site. Thank you:-)
Cool site. Thanks.
Posted by: ford part pickup truck at December 19, 2006 12:49 PMCool site. Thanks!
Cool site. Thanks.
Posted by: 1952 ford part pickup at December 19, 2006 01:25 PMCool site. Thanks.
Cool site. Thank you!!!
Cool site. Thanks!!!
Posted by: 1951 ford pickup part at December 19, 2006 02:10 PMCool site. Thanks!
Cool site. Thanks!
Good site. Thank you:-)
Very good site. Thanks!
Posted by: 1951 ford pickup truck at December 19, 2006 02:54 PMCool site. Thank you.
Good site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: classic ford pickup truck at December 19, 2006 03:29 PMVery good site. Thanks.
Cool site. Thank you.
Posted by: 1972 ford f100 pickup truck at December 19, 2006 04:10 PMNice site. Thanks!
Good site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: 2008 f250 ford pickup at December 19, 2006 04:54 PMNice site. Thank you!
Good site. Thanks!!!
Posted by: 1973 1979 f ford pickup series at December 19, 2006 05:27 PMGood site. Thanks.
Cool site. Thank you!!!
Nice site. Thanks.
Very good site. Thanks.
Cool site. Thank you:-)
Cool site. Thank you:-)
Nice site. Thank you:-)
Good site. Thank you!!!
Cool site. Thank you.
Nice site. Thanks.
Cool site. Thanks:-)
Cool site. Thanks:-)
Very good site. Thanks:-)
Cool site. Thank you:-)
Good site. Thanks!
Good site. Thank you:-)
Nice site. Thanks.
Very good site. Thank you!!!
Good site. Thanks.
Cool site. Thank you.
Good site. Thanks!
Nice site. Thanks!
Cool site. Thanks!!!
Good site. Thank you.
Good site. Thanks.
Very good site. Thanks!
Cool site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: dish network vs directv at December 20, 2006 12:51 AMCool site. Thanks!
Cool site. Thank you:-)
Cool site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: directv dvr at December 20, 2006 01:34 AMCool site. Thanks:-)
Posted by: directv dvr at December 20, 2006 01:35 AMVery good site. Thank you!!!
Nice site. Thanks.
Good site. Thank you!!!
Good site. Thank you!!!
Cool site. Thanks!!!
Cool site. Thank you!!!
Posted by: free hentai game at December 20, 2006 03:02 AMVery good site. Thanks!
Cool site. Thank you.
Very good site. Thanks!!!
Cool site. Thanks!
Very good site. Thank you:-)
Very good site. Thank you:-)
Good site. Thanks:-)
Good site. Thanks.